toxic relationships

see aside from the daddy issues and mommy issues and the assault and the rape i would have to say… the thing that broke me the most was the 2 people who completely broke me. 1 male . one female . yep you heard it another teenage bisexual blah blah blah. but one thing i know is that this is no phase i was into girls way before i started dating guys. but my sexuality is not the point. lets start where everything started February 14th 2017 i met and went on a first date with my first love Moe. i hadn’t ever been with someone in any kind a way i liked him. he came over march 7th lost my virginity to him and we started dating. it all ended a few months later. now he wasn’t the guy that broke me. he was just the first guy i ever felt love for. we was fucking until October while we was broken up i got pregnant… at 14 lost the baby 3 months and 26 days into my pregnancy no one new abt it till i lost the baby. it was hard but Cheyenne was there. oh yes a new name haven’t heard that one yet have you? ya i wish i never heard it at all. long story short me and her was talking for 2 years and we became closer and closer then fell in love well i fell in love with her and she said she did me but you dont do what she did to me to people you love. she lied she cheated with to many people to count… LITERALLY it sucked and i was so broken.. i loved her and she made me soo happy. but i was use to the hurt the first girl to break my heart was my mom and the first guy was my father. i guess you could say i have really shitty taste when it comes to relationships but shit. it runs in the family. my mom has always been with guys who abuse her and cheat and druggies. but i dont wanna be like my mom . im not , i know when to leave . well maybe i should have left these relationships a little sooner but shit at least im not with a guy who beats me and cheats and goes out and does every drug under the mood and cant go a day without a 18 pack of Budweiser. its been 5 years mom. LEAVE, but she wont this aint about my moms shitty relationship its about mine. now lets talk about something more recent, October 31st 2018 i went to this guy named Dylan house and we just clicked. we had been talking on the phone for hoursssss and i decided i was gonna go to his Halloween get together/ party it was fun my best friend was there and a bunch of cool ass people. got super fucking baked and had hella fun. we started dating and i stayed with him for 2 weeks. the day i had to leave he fingered a bitch i hate named tori and slept in the same bed we was sleeping in with her. i really liked him so it really hurt and we had been friends for like a year before all of this. i gave you another chance because i wanted to believe him soooo i gave him another chance he tried to fuck one of my best friends and was talking to hella other girls . i broke up with him and was very broken inside and very broken i loved him and it just sucked always being hurt. i cut again for the first time sense i lost my baby. over a year . no cutting then i cut 3 times in 2 weeks my legs are beyond fucked.so yes im really really shitty when it comes to relationships.

see ya fuckers – lexxx